Report: Facebook is Destroying Marriages

In an article published yesterday, The Telegraph reported:

The social networking site, which connects old friends and allows users to make new ones online, is being blamed for an increasing number of marital breakdowns.

Divorce lawyers claim the explosion in the popularity of websites such as Facebook and Bebo is tempting to people to cheat on their partners…

One law firm, which specialises in divorce, claimed almost one in five petitions they processed cited Facebook.

To suggest that Facebook is at least partially to blame for 20% of divorces seems a bit of an exaggeration to me.  And the article does cite only one law firm reporting that number, so it could be an anomaly.  Who knows, the reporter may have even intentionally chosen to cite the highest number they could find in an attempt to add weight to their claim.

Never the less, it does make sense that with Facebook’s power to help people connect and reconnect, that people would use it to develop inappropriate relationships.

So, what do you think?  Does Facebook deserve the blame for helping to facilitate affairs?

Do you think increased use of Facebook and other social networking sites is going to lead to an even higher divorce rate?

[heard through Mashable, image johnbullas]

Paul Steinbrueck is co-founder and CEO of OurChurch.Com, elder of CypressMeadows.org, husband, father of 3, blogger. You can follow him on Twitter at @PaulSteinbrueck and add him to your circles at Google+ as +Paul Steinbrueck.

17 Responses to “Report: Facebook is Destroying Marriages”

  1. In short no they can't and shouldn't be blamed.

    My personal belief is that if one is going to stray from their marriage then one doesn't need FB, Twitter, et al to do it. It might be a handy excuse but it isn't a reason.

  2. Aaaah yes…the blame and shame game….
    If you want to have an affair this is just 1 of the ways you could do it!!!

  3. the real life contact is where we need to worry about eg.workplace not facebook etc

  4. I am a minister…a pastor of 35 years…and just recently…I spoke with an individual who had met an old acquaintance through FB..(farm town app)…she expressed her marriage was not good…and that she traveled and met with this individual who was also married…they had a brief affair…I know this maybe an exception to all rules…but after several sessions I convinced her to open up to her husband…ask forgiveness and save their marriage…at my last conversation with her …it had worked….

  5. If people is going to cheat on their spouses, they will do it…regardless of facebook being a means or not. There are exceptions to every rule…Facebook is also a place where people can learn about Christ and maybe experience Him for the first time. Seeds are being planted thru Facebook…will people take advantage of a good thing? We always do! Is Facebook a means of finding an adultrous affair? Not any more than a mall or a cell phone or e-mail…Very sadly a few years ago there was an adultrous affair at the church I was attending, between the Pastor and the church secretary! We are born with a sin nature and only thru Jesus Christ can we be loosed from it.

    • This may be true, but FB makes it so much easier to meet people and to hide behind a login ID and secret password. It is also a form of cheating that may lead up to something more personable such as meeting, etc.

  6. Fb is a tool and like any tool we have in life around us today can be used for good as well as used for sin. The most importent thing is to be on guard at all times. The one who thinks that will not happen to them is one thatiuss a very damiging mind set.

  7. i just recently had a run in concerning this problem……my fiance had befriended women he did not know that were provocatively dressed ….. and i was suspicious. i found his page up one day and he had not completely logged out. …i found that he had sent private messages to these women in which they responded back …. i was furious….he informed me it was innocents… i certainly don't agree…we almost split over this…said i didn't trust him and that i was controlling..and jealous…….the question is ……am i being controlling…..and silly about confronting him on this matter……….is this a serious enough reason to go seperate ways….or am i blowing things out of proportion……..i mean he has never met up with anyone else face to face….

    • PaulSteinbrueck Jan 6, 2011 at 2:41 pm

      From what you're telling me, I don't think you're blowing things out of proportion at all. Just because 2 people don't meet up in person doesn't make the relationship right. It sounds like your fiance is pursuing emotional affairs online, and that's a betrayal of your trust and your commitment to each other. I think you need to have a conversation. And personally, I would not marry a person unless they were willing to end flirtatious relationships and were comfortable showing me their messages any time.

  8. my fiance came in the door while i was reading your reply….we argued….then he read your response…not only was facebook an issue….but i found a ton of porn…..we argued a whole lot … form monday to saturday…..he insisted i was crazy and controlling……….in the end he told me that with the medical issue i have been going through the last few months…..that was his outlet…..with out actually physically cheating…… i feal it is mentally and emotionally …….he is still lusting after other women…..he agreed to stop looking at it on the net… and got rid of all the movies he had in his possesion……..he also sat down with me and gave me his password to his accounts so i can check status at any time…….we ended the weak by going to church sunday …and the lesson was on phillipians….God knows what lesson he needed both of us to hear………

    thank you for your response

    • PaulSteinbrueck Jan 10, 2011 at 5:04 pm

      Wow, if I understand what you're saying it sounds like you've made a couple difficult but positive steps in the right direction. That's great!

  9. Hmm honestly? I feel that Facebook does play a role in destroying friendships and marriages. There are people that say "if your partner was going to stray, they were gonna do it anyways"…not always true. For example…there are many people who are out here that have never robbed a bank and dont plan on doing so due to the repercussions and consequences that come with it, right? But what if it was made simple? What if they could rob a bank in the simplest form without getting caught or hurting anyone? I can gurauntee that a lot of people who have never done it before would jump on the offer. Facebook is the same way with relationships. There are people who dont cheat because there is too much to risk to go out and meet someone to cheat with. However, when you have social networking websites making it very easy for you to connect with people and talk on a personal level without any real evidence being left behind, its so much easier to cheat than it was before.

  10. No facebook or no other internet site is the reason for divorce increase. People who want to cheat..will cheat. Let's face it. We live in a screwed up world. Committment, vows etc. don't mean nothing no more. No one really cares a crap not even your spouse or significant other. Sorry.

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  12. I firmly believe facebook is of the devil. It is an artificial enviornment where people can go on there and have emotional affairs which can lead to adultery. I am deleting my facebook for this reason, I started sharing way too much personal information with someone because I needed "comfort" through the pain of my marital separation. I feel very guilty, but am lucky to have finally come to my senses.

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